How to be a good Wife to your Husband

Qualities in a good Wife

Every married man wishes to have a good wife. Many people advice the new bride to be a good wife to her husband. But what are the makings of a good or perfect wife? Many women do not know. Many of the qualities of a good wife are already inbuilt in a person and the rest can be developed.

In India the qualities of a good wife or eight noble virtues an ideal wife should have are summed up in the verse from Neethisaram.

"Karyeshu Dasi, Karaneshu Manthri; Bhojeshu Mata, Shayaneshu Rambha,

Roopeshu lakshmi, Kshamayeshu Dharitri, Satkarma Nari, Kuladharma Pathni".

Here are some of the Qualities a man looks in his wife.

1) Be pleasant: It is said that ‘we need to treat others the way we want ourselves to be treated.’ Never be rude to our husband, family and friends. Be warm, kind, positive, understanding and friendly. Work to be pleasant toward your husband. Don’t be one of those people who make everyone around you feel bad just because you’ve had a hard day. Welcome your husband with a smile when he comes home instead of a sour face. A good wife honors her hubby by keeping a pleasant tone in her voice, a happy smile on her face and a neat and clean appearance. Listen to him talk about his day especially if it was a difficult one. If you don't like how you partner treats you, take a minute to notice how you treat your partner and correct your behavior.

2) Treat your Husband with Respect: If you expect respect from others we need to treat others with respect too. Haven’t we all heard ‘Give respect and take respect’. Respect can be reflected in the way one talks and behaves. Always speak in a loving and refrain from speaking in a harsh manner. A good wife respects her hubby and she never chooses to belittle, strike, humiliate or otherwise harm him in private nor in public. It is better to watch what you say and to think your thoughts through before speaking as it is not possible to take back the words once they have been spoken. A good wife will treat her man with respect in front of others and at home.

3) Communicate: Communication is key to a good and solid marriage. Do not hide things from your husband or keep secrets after marriage. Be honest to him. Find time to sit and talk with your husband on a daily basis even if it is for only half an hour. If you let things bottle up and feel that you cannot share with your husband anything then your marriage is in trouble. Be a good listener when your husband is talking. You may have a dozen important things to tell him but allow him to talk first. Don't greet him with complaints and problems the moment he comes back from work. Good Communication also helps to build trust and strengthen your relationship. After marriage the wife and husband are a team or partners. Do not take any major decisions about the family without consulting with husband. Fights or problems may happen in between the two but do not let the world know about it rather solve it between yourselves. The fight you had last week over shopping or whatever is over and done with. So move on with it and stop rehashing old stuff and reminding him of his faults. Do not resort to name calling, hitting, spitting, breaking dishes or anything else when you lose your temper. If you do he may actually start to fall out of love with you and you could lose him all together.

4) Be Supportive: A husband expects wife’s support and understanding especially in times of troubles. A good wife loves her hubby through his successes and failures and provides reassurance when he's feeling down. She is a nurturer and an equal partner in the marriage. Support your husband in all stages of his career and life. Do not belittle your man or hurt his ego. It is often heard saying that ‘a wife can make a man or break a man’. There’s no quicker way to build resentment in your man than to criticize him or belittle him especially in front of others. Be proud of him on his accomplishments and genuinely complement him. If you do this you can expect your husband to behave with you in the same manner and also respect you more for your support and thoughtfulness. When you don’t agree with him respectfully let him know you don’t agree.

5) Do not nag: No man would like a nagging wife. If you want to get your own way ask him nicely. Many wives think that is the only way to get her husband to do things is by nagging. But the truth is that your nagging can create unwanted rift or can make things worse between the two of you. Your husband is a grown man with his own thoughts and desires. Just because you think he should be doing something particular doesn't mean he has to do it.

6) Give him his space: As a wife you need to understand you’re your husband has a life other than you also. He has his family, friends and colleagues who too are part of his life. He also may have some hobbies or passions he is involved in. Don’t expect his undivided attention. Don’t stop him if he wants to go out and hang out with his friends sometimes or engage in a hobby or sport that he likes. An interfering wife can sometimes be too irritating.

7) Keep him happy in Bed: Sexual intimacy is one of the most essential things in any marriage. Please your man in bed. If you cannot keep your man happy in Bed he would go where he can get it. After all, a Man is a man!

8) Plan Surprises: Men like surprises too. It can be anything like organizing his birthday party without him knowing about it or planning a special night of passion by playing a seductress. Your surprises do not have to be elaborate and can be as simple as making him his favorite snack or his favorite dishes once in a while even if you would rather eat something else.

9) Express your love and appreciation often: Men likes praises and appreciation. Make the best of your time together. Men like to hear the words ‘I love you’ too. Also join him in activities that he's interested in even though you would have preferred to do something else or give him a thoughtful gift once in a while. Make it a point never to forget the special days in his life. Pamper him very often. Be his ‘little slave’ when he is at home. You can even cook for him or give him a good massage. Making him dependent on you by doing his chores when he is at home is not a bad idea. Let him miss you and think about you when you are not around. These gestures won’t go unnoticed and it may even inspire him to do something nice for you. Don't withhold affection.

10) Honesty, Loyalty and Dedication: A good wife would be honest, loyal and dedicated to her husband. Marriage is a life long commitment and the vows you have taken at the time of marriage should be kept in all conditions.

11) Prepare yourself: A good wife honors her hubby by keeping a pleasant tone in her voice, a happy smile on her face and a neat and clean appearance. Take special care about your appearance and everyday. Include exercises or yoga in your daily routine. Be hygienic. Some woman feel that once they are married why they should dress up or take care of their appearance. A man likes his wife to smell good. If you are unhealthy or not presentable your man may cheat you behind your back.

12) Prepare the House: Maintain a clean house all the time. Clear away the clutter and spend time decorating the house. Apart from this be wise with money and take all the responsibilities of a wife seriously without complaining.

I am sure any man would be happy to get a wife with all these qualities. Have I left anything? Please feel free to add through comments.

13 Ways to Keep Your Husband Happy

Okay ladies, we have already talked about what men can do to keep you happynow let's take a look a few things you can do to show respect to your hubby and keep him smiling.

1. After washing your beautiful locks, don't forget to pick up your hair from the shower drain. It may not bother you but he doesn't like untangling your hair from his big toe.

2. Be understanding of his work schedule. An occasional afternoon call to see when he will be home is fine but when you begin to stalk him daily at 5:01, his boss starts waiting for your call.

3. Let him play with his friends. As long as they are not 5'9, single, intelligent, beautiful and looking for a husband. Seriously, guys need guy friends to hang out with and do boy stuff. Your husband will be happier and won't be so impatient when your girlfriends call you during dinner, breakfast, lunch and sex.

4. Speaking of…, don't let yourself go. That doesn't mean you must maintain a certain weight or length of hair for the sake of your marriage, but it is a gesture of love to take pride in your appearance. You may expect the same from him and you both deserve a mate that is clean, showered, shaved and cares about their health.

5. Buy your own razor. Quit sneaking his razor out of his bathroom to shave your legs and underarms then attempt to conceal the offense by drying it off with his face towel so it doesn't get yours dirty and put it back as if you never used it. (Yes, I have personal experience and he always knows!!!)

6. Compliment him, genuinely and often. Let him know how much you appreciate the little and the big things he does for you and the family. Taking out the trash may be part of his "routine," but acknowledging his efforts will keep him motivated to continue.

7. Don't hide the credit card bills. Be honest with him, even if it hurts. It’s better to hear the truth from you than your creditors.

8. Take the initiative to practice random acts of kindness. Don't wait for Valentine's Day or his birthday to buy him a little "love gift" or write him a love letter. Hug him going out the door in the morning and coming back in the door at night. He's going to wonder what you are up to!

9. Don't talk bad about his parents or his siblings. It’s difficult to kiss someone that just called his mother a tarantula and his father an orangutan. Remember that he is an offspring of that union, which would make him a tarangutan and you the tarangutans bride.

10. Treat him like you did when you first started dating. Don't forget simple words such as "please," "thank you" and "excuse me."

11. Remember all those bodily functions you tried to keep discreet while you were in the throes of wooing him? Just because you have been married several years and are very comfortable around your beloved doesn't mean you can now blow, snort and pick to your heart's content.

12. Plan a date night to do something he loves, even if you don't. Instead of seeing the latest chick flick, compromise and see an action movie and go to dinner at a place you mutually enjoy. Have a couple of glasses of wine so you can sleep through the car chases.

13. Never go to bed angry. Cliché, yes, but true. A well-rested husband is a happy husband—it’s much better to go to bed next to someone that you can curl up next to, rather than someone you must put pillows in between.

Who are our friends?

Scientists have looked close at the phenomenon of female friendship and reported their finding in one of the most influential scientific journal Science.

The study involved women aged between 25 and 35 years old. Researchers discovered that more than 70 percent of women think that a true friendship is when you can be yourself with your friend.

Women also reported that a true friend is who you can rely on (36 percent of those polled) and who you don’t need to explain the reasons behind your behavior to (24 percent of respondents). Researchers further revealed that women generally prefer age peers as friends and long time friendship. “Long time” varied among women in the study, from 10 to 21 years depending on the age group of respondents.

Almost 30 percent of women reported their friendships were built at work, 40 percent at school and 32 percent at the college. When asked about underlying friendship rules most women named being able to support emotionally at bad times and never messing around with a friend’s partner.

10 Little Ways To Show Your Husband You Care

Before I even start the list, I will state the obvious; every woman already knows what to do to make her husband happy, at least for a short time. I am including it just so the men don’t feel cheated or think that I don’t understand what they really, really want. Make his favorite dinner occasionally. Bring him a beer when he’s watching the game. Take off your clothes. Anytime is fine.

1. Let him know you are his biggest fan. Tell him how great he is, how much you appreciate the little things he does to help you (no matter how small), and how much he’s loved. I am not suggesting you lie. If you are not his biggest fan, you should be!

2. It is best to avoid asking questions such as “What are you thinking about, honey?” Men hate this because they know they will get themselves into trouble if they tell you what they were really thinking. Or they can't remember.

3. Always speak highly of him to others. Don’t call up your best friend to tell her about his latest stupid mistake.

4. Don’t cut him down. It may be tempting to tell him exactly what you think of him during an argument, but hold your tongue. Deep down, somewhere, you love this man, and shredding him to bits will only make the situation worse. Don’t remind him of his weaknesses at every opportunity. Most men are fully aware of their weaknesses and do not need reminding.

5. Be quick to apologize for snapping at him when you are tired and cranky.

6. Listen to what he has to say. This may include topics that you neither understand nor care to be enlightened about, such as the rules of fantasy football or a comparison of programming codes.

7. Although it is widely believed that men are dogs, don’t treat him like one. Don’t attempt to keep him on a short leash, or even long chain. I know the idea of a shock collar (as used in dog training) is appealing, but really, he’s a big boy now.

8. Appreciate who he is and don’t try to change him. You knew who he was when you married him. Trying to make him into something different is: A. a waste of your time because it will not work and B. just annoying. He was flawless in your eyes when you first met. Is he really not good enough now? I know, you have grown and changed and expanded. Let him appreciate you, but stay the same.

9. Encourage his hobbies, even if you aren’t fond of them. My husband loves motorcycles. People are always saying things like “I can’t believe your wife let you have a bike” and “How could you let him do that?” Let him? That’s not how it is supposed to work. He is my husband, not my child. Yes, I worry. I ask him call to check in. I also love to see the smile on his face when returns safely from a nice long ride.

10. Don’t make fun of his team, even if they always lose. It is likely that your husband has been programmed since birth to be a fan of a particular sports team. This rule additionally applies to Star Trek and Star Wars fans. If your husband is still a fan of the band KISS, then you have permission to go wild with abuse